Author Topic: Village News - Please add yours  (Read 33244 times)

minniemouse

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Re: Village News - Please add yours
« Reply #30 on: Apr 17, 2017, 08:58:47 AM »
 ;D ;D  clever.
Smoking kills you, bacon kills you, smoking bacon cures it.

Grumpyfrog

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Re: Village News - Please add yours
« Reply #31 on: Apr 17, 2017, 09:50:22 AM »
Ladies, don't forget the jumble sale.
It's a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house.
Bring your husbands.
I started out with nothing and I've still got most of it left!  Seasick Steve 2008

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minniemouse

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Re: Village News - Please add yours
« Reply #32 on: Apr 17, 2017, 12:49:12 PM »
Vacancy for village Blacksmith, must be used to handling hot stuff.
Smoking kills you, bacon kills you, smoking bacon cures it.

Ashy

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Re: Village News - Please add yours
« Reply #33 on: Apr 17, 2017, 03:19:00 PM »
Mr Snaith our M.P. apologises as there will not be any formal invitations sent out for the Sale of Work, because he has not done any this year.
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zoony

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Re: Village News - Please add yours
« Reply #34 on: Apr 17, 2017, 04:07:34 PM »
The Village Chess Society will meet on Wednesday at 8pm.


Invited guest Mr Ivan Smersh will give a mating demonstration..
« Last Edit: Apr 17, 2017, 04:21:20 PM by zoony »

Ashy

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Re: Village News - Please add yours
« Reply #35 on: Apr 17, 2017, 08:26:39 PM »
The Village Chess Society will meet on Wednesday at 8pm.


Invited guest Mr Ivan Smersh will give a mating demonstration..

He will have a large model laid out on the table.
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zoony

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Re: Village News - Please add yours
« Reply #36 on: Apr 17, 2017, 08:30:57 PM »
 ;D ;D ;D

Ashy

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Re: Village News - Please add yours
« Reply #37 on: Apr 17, 2017, 08:35:20 PM »
I think the chess club might be popular this week!
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Ashy

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Re: Village News - Please add yours
« Reply #38 on: Apr 18, 2017, 08:54:10 AM »
Following complaints about the vicar's housekeeper wearing a very short mini-skirt, the revd. has agreed to raise it at the next parish council meeting.
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Grumpyfrog

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Re: Village News - Please add yours
« Reply #39 on: Apr 18, 2017, 09:34:59 AM »
The service will close with "Little Drops of Water."
One of the ladies will start quietly and the rest of the congregation will join in.
I started out with nothing and I've still got most of it left!  Seasick Steve 2008

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zoony

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Re: Village News - Please add yours
« Reply #40 on: Apr 18, 2017, 10:20:06 AM »
Miss Hartibeast is selling her beautiful wedding dress and welcomes enquiries. As new, never worn.

Ashy

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Re: Village News - Please add yours
« Reply #41 on: Apr 18, 2017, 08:23:13 PM »
The Village Dentist's wife, Mrs Trotter, will be making tarts and flans again for the Sale of Work, with a variety of fillings in them.
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Grumpyfrog

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Re: Village News - Please add yours
« Reply #42 on: Apr 18, 2017, 08:40:29 PM »
Weight Watchers will meet at 7 pm at the Church Hall.
Please use the large double door at the side entrance.
I started out with nothing and I've still got most of it left!  Seasick Steve 2008

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zoony

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Re: Village News - Please add yours
« Reply #43 on: Apr 18, 2017, 08:55:25 PM »
We're happy to announce the forthcoming marriage of Henry Pickleton and Hortense Malady, thus ending a wonderful friendship they've shared since Primary School.

Ashy

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Re: Village News - Please add yours
« Reply #44 on: Apr 18, 2017, 09:02:27 PM »
The Village Apathy Group has cancelled its meetings until further notice.
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