Author Topic: Husband wanted:  (Read 471 times)

zoony

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Husband wanted:
« on: May 26, 2018, 11:56:34 PM »
  Must be in my age group (70s). Must not beat me or run around on me. Must still be good in bed!!
       Apply in person.


Couple of days later the doorbell rings which she answers to find an older, white-haired gentleman with a nice smile and a twinkle in his eye in a wheelchair who appeared to be limbless. "Hi" sez he."I'm here to answer your ad."
  The old lady looked him up and down. "You don't really expect me to consider a man with no legs or arms?" Said she. "Well, no legs means I can't run around on you and with no arms I can never beat you." The old gentleman said. "True enough " says the old lady "But what about sex?"
"Well," He sez "I rang the doorbell didn't I?"
"Listen to the wind, it cleans the mind."

"Never use money to measure wealth, son"

                                           cowboy wisdom.

Phil

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Re: Husband wanted:
« Reply #1 on: May 27, 2018, 09:01:20 AM »
 ;D ;D ;D
"I've stopped arguing with idiots. They will only bring me down to their level and beat me with experience.”

Paraphrased from George Carlin

Scrumpy

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Re: Husband wanted:
« Reply #2 on: May 27, 2018, 10:55:11 AM »



 I have a pull bell..!!!!! I'd like to see him try..
Everything will be alright in the end, and if it’s not alright, its not the end.

Alex22

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Re: Husband wanted:
« Reply #3 on: May 27, 2018, 11:00:57 AM »
 ;D ;D ;D
.

Ashy

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Re: Husband wanted:
« Reply #4 on: May 27, 2018, 11:29:38 AM »
I read that joke out to my wife and she simply said "Well how did he ring the bell then?"

Scrumpy

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Re: Husband wanted:
« Reply #5 on: May 27, 2018, 12:01:08 PM »
 ;D ;D ;D  Bless her..  Show her how it's done Ashy.
Everything will be alright in the end, and if it’s not alright, its not the end.

Ashy

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Re: Husband wanted:
« Reply #6 on: May 27, 2018, 12:11:13 PM »
I don't mind having a go at the door knocker but the doorbell is a bit too high up.

crabbyob

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Re: Husband wanted:
« Reply #7 on: May 27, 2018, 01:02:37 PM »
well in the joke the old guy uses a chair
personally
i'd use my nose
“Life may not be the party we hoped for, but as we are already here we may as well dance”

Scrumpy

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Re: Husband wanted:
« Reply #8 on: May 27, 2018, 02:53:58 PM »



There's a saying about people with big noses.. Oh! no.. I got it wrong. It's feet.
Everything will be alright in the end, and if it’s not alright, its not the end.

crabbyob

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Re: Husband wanted:
« Reply #9 on: May 27, 2018, 02:57:30 PM »
i know its wrong Scrumps....sigh
“Life may not be the party we hoped for, but as we are already here we may as well dance”

zoony

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Re: Husband wanted:
« Reply #10 on: May 27, 2018, 02:59:15 PM »
Cheer up...they both smell..
"Listen to the wind, it cleans the mind."

"Never use money to measure wealth, son"

                                           cowboy wisdom.

crabbyob

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Re: Husband wanted:
« Reply #11 on: May 27, 2018, 03:01:33 PM »
but only one of them runs
“Life may not be the party we hoped for, but as we are already here we may as well dance”

Scrumpy

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Re: Husband wanted:
« Reply #12 on: May 27, 2018, 03:08:53 PM »



Feet.. Run.. They can go from yards to miles..
Everything will be alright in the end, and if it’s not alright, its not the end.

crabbyob

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Re: Husband wanted:
« Reply #13 on: May 27, 2018, 03:10:35 PM »
in my family feet smell and noses run
“Life may not be the party we hoped for, but as we are already here we may as well dance”