Author Topic: Awww cute....  (Read 269 times)

Floydian

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Awww cute....
« on: Jun 01, 2018, 12:14:01 AM »
I have a little satnav, it sits there in my car.
A satnav is a drivers friend, it tells you where you are.
I have a little satnav, I've had it most my life, it's better than the normal ones, my satnav is my wife.
It gives me full instructions, especially how to drive, "it's sixty miles an hour, it says, "and you're doing sixty five".
It tells me when to stop and start and when to use the brake, and tells me that it's never ever safe to overtake.
It tells me when a light is red, and when it goes to green, it seems to know instinctively, just when to intervene.
It notes the vehicles just in front, and all those to the rear,
And taking this into account, it specifies my gear.
I'm sure no other driver has so helpful a device, for when we leave and lock the car it still gives it's advice.
It fills me up with counselling, each journey's pretty fraught, so why don't i exchange it and get a quieter sort?
Ah well, you see, it cleans the house, makes sure I'm properly fed, it washes all my shirts and things and keeps me warm in bed.
Despite all these advantages, and my tendency to scoff,
I only wish that now and then, i could turn the bugger off!
"Unbelievable, Jeff...."

zoony

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Re: Awww cute....
« Reply #1 on: Jun 01, 2018, 12:55:17 AM »
Pam Ayres at her doggerilish best mate. ;D
"Listen to the wind, it cleans the mind."

"Never use money to measure wealth, son"

                                           cowboy wisdom.

Alex22

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Re: Awww cute....
« Reply #2 on: Jun 01, 2018, 09:23:42 AM »
 ;D ;D ;D
.

crabbyob

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Re: Awww cute....
« Reply #3 on: Jun 01, 2018, 09:53:11 AM »
class, im just about to fiddle with mine
i now just use google maps on the phone
tho i have downloaded an app called offline maps
i will let you lnow
“Life may not be the party we hoped for, but as we are already here we may as well dance”

Floydian

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Re: Awww cute....
« Reply #4 on: Jun 01, 2018, 10:06:48 AM »
I'm not generally into poems and limericks but i thought I'd share that one, it's even funnier when heard with her accent though.
I've got an ageing tomtom, i can't even update it now its that far out of date but it's adequate for the couple of times a year i need it. It's got several different celebrity "voices" on it which are fun on a long run.
"Unbelievable, Jeff...."

Scrumpy

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Re: Awww cute....
« Reply #5 on: Jun 02, 2018, 09:36:01 AM »
 ;D ;D ;D
Everything will be alright in the end, and if it’s not alright, its not the end.

Raven

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Re: Awww cute....
« Reply #6 on: Jun 02, 2018, 10:45:17 AM »
I love it lol. That's cheered me up on a really lousy day.. Thanks.. :D