Author Topic: covid-19 - the effects  (Read 582 times)

Michael Rolls

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covid-19 - the effects
« on: May 01, 2020, 10:11:48 AM »
It is with great sadness that I have to announce the effects of covid-19 locally. A bra manufacturer has gone bust, a submarine company has gone under, a manufacturer of food blenders has gone into liquidation, a dog kennel has had to call in the retrievers, a company supplying paper for origami enthusiasts has folded, Interflora is pruning its business, Dynorod has gone down the drain, but the saddest one of all is the local ice-cream van man. He was found dead, covered in nuts and raspberry sauce – he couldn’t take  it any more so topped himself
Thank you for the days, the days you gave me.
The older I get, the better I was!

Ashy

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Re: covid-19 - the effects
« Reply #1 on: May 01, 2020, 10:16:56 AM »
 :) :) :) ;D :)

Scrumpy

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Re: covid-19 - the effects
« Reply #2 on: May 01, 2020, 11:39:15 AM »
 ;D ;D ;D
Everything will be alright in the end, and if it’s not alright, its not the end.

sparky

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Re: covid-19 - the effects
« Reply #3 on: May 01, 2020, 11:45:00 AM »
Would that be the same Bra company near me that went t*ts up.

klondike

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Re: covid-19 - the effects
« Reply #4 on: May 01, 2020, 12:18:33 PM »
 ;D ;D ;D
So long and thanks for all the fish

stellamaris

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Re: covid-19 - the effects
« Reply #5 on: May 01, 2020, 12:21:09 PM »
Wrong thread maybe.  But they should have diversified to face masks ;D ;D


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oZ89eq6vbFk


Or have I missed this on another thread :-[
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GrannyMac

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Re: covid-19 - the effects
« Reply #6 on: May 01, 2020, 12:22:31 PM »
Very good Mike! 😄😄
Just because you’re offended doesn’t mean you’re right.

R. Gervais

Michael Rolls

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Re: covid-19 - the effects
« Reply #7 on: May 01, 2020, 05:19:00 PM »
Glad you liked it - not original, my b-i-l passed it on - don't know where he got it
Mike
Thank you for the days, the days you gave me.
The older I get, the better I was!

klondike

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Re: covid-19 - the effects
« Reply #8 on: May 01, 2020, 06:03:46 PM »
There was an Asimov short Sci fi story where it turned out all jokes other than puns were of alien origin. I don't  recall the title but might be able to find it.


Here you go https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jokester


Plot summary

Noel Meyerhof is a "Grand Master", one of a small cadre of Earth's recognised geniuses, who has the insight to know what questions to ask Multivac. But a computer scientist is concerned that Meyerhof is acting erratically. As a known joke-teller, he has been discovered feeding jokes and riddles into Multivac.


By computer analysis, the characters in the story investigate the origin of humour, particularly why there seems to be no such thing as an original joke, except for puns. Every normal joke is something that was originally heard from someone else.


The computer eventually tells them that humour is actually a psychological study tool imposed from without by extraterrestrials studying mankind, similarly to how humans study mice. They needed to isolate the responses to their jokes from original ones, so they "programmed" us to react differently to puns.


The characters of the story conjecture that figuring this fact out makes it useless as a tool, so the aliens will turn off humour. And suddenly nothing is ever funny again.
So long and thanks for all the fish

Michael Rolls

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Re: covid-19 - the effects
« Reply #9 on: May 01, 2020, 06:31:04 PM »
I actually read that about half a century ago. There was a similar sort of tale, can’t remember who wrote it, where all powerful aliens had to decide if the human race should be allowed to continue or if it should be eliminated. They landed and came across a cat; their awesome intelligence allowed them to converse with the cat, delving deep into its subconscious. They decided that if humanity was willing to put up with so independent a creature as a moggie, they deserved to be allowed to continue!
Mike
Thank you for the days, the days you gave me.
The older I get, the better I was!

klondike

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Re: covid-19 - the effects
« Reply #10 on: May 01, 2020, 06:41:22 PM »
Unfortunately I haven't come across that one. Knowing the author made finding the one I remembered from about that long ago too quite easy.
So long and thanks for all the fish

Michael Rolls

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Re: covid-19 - the effects
« Reply #11 on: May 01, 2020, 07:06:08 PM »
Again it must be over 50 years since I read it.
Mike (I keep forgetting how old I am - it could well have been 60 years ago!)
Thank you for the days, the days you gave me.
The older I get, the better I was!