Author Topic: Mourning etiquette  (Read 358 times)

sneakysnoopysniper

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Mourning etiquette
« on: Apr 16, 2021, 08:50:21 AM »
Apparently there were multiple complaints because some TV announcers of both sexes (on the independent channels) were wearing dark blue or purple instead of black. For example a midnight blue jacket with a purple tie. Pretty ludicrous when you consider that in 2021 any dull dark colour is considered acceptable for a funeral. No one expects anyone to have special mourning clothes any more unless they are prominent in public life.

Apparently the TV companies keep a supply of black jackets and ties on hand in case of a high profile death. When the royal family travel they always include at least one black outfit "just in case".

Traditionally purple and dark blue have always been considered acceptable alternatives to black. I wore purple for my father's funeral and my sister wore dark blue.
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sparky

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Re: Mourning etiquette
« Reply #1 on: Apr 16, 2021, 08:53:59 AM »
I'm wearing black underpants at the moment, does that count ?.

Michael Rolls

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Re: Mourning etiquette
« Reply #2 on: Apr 16, 2021, 08:55:45 AM »
so am I, but don't tell anyone. Being serious, I have only ever warn black to funerals - but that is really because I have always had at least one black suit - still do for that matter.
Mike
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klondike

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Re: Mourning etiquette
« Reply #3 on: Apr 16, 2021, 09:02:23 AM »
I'm hoping that the next funeral I attend will be my own.

sneakysnoopysniper

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Re: Mourning etiquette
« Reply #4 on: Apr 16, 2021, 09:24:22 AM »
One of the things I often sell is Victorian mourning jewellery. The Victorians made an absolute cult of mourning (thank you Victoria) and we are still living with that today in terms of whats considered appropriate. I have several books on it.
Rules are for the guidance of wise men and the blind obedience of fools

crabbyob

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Re: Mourning etiquette
« Reply #5 on: Apr 16, 2021, 10:55:40 AM »
my god, i had better get upstairs and try the black suit... i have no chance of it fitting
i am also wearing black underpants... strange isnt it, in our younger days we always wore white, i suspect i might get burned in my kilt, i wonder if they will 'bother' with underpants... ;D ... i am always relieved to get past the 25th of January
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zoony

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Re: Mourning etiquette
« Reply #6 on: Apr 16, 2021, 11:05:45 AM »
We always wore white underwear cos that's all there was, no?
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crabbyob

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Re: Mourning etiquette
« Reply #7 on: Apr 16, 2021, 11:26:56 AM »
i remember seeing one lad with grey underpants, not dirty white but grey
i bet her neighbours nudged each other when his mam pegged them out...
“If women ran the world we wouldn’t have wars, just intense negotiations every 28 days.”

Scrumpy

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Re: Mourning etiquette
« Reply #8 on: Apr 16, 2021, 11:57:19 AM »



The last send off I went to was a local boy who was a lovely character.. He would walk for miles waving at all who passed him.. Around his neck was a display of jewellery that he had collected over the years.. He wore clothes that dazzled.. colours that were varied.. He was like a rainbow that had fallen to earth. .. On the day of his funeral we all gathered near his house dressed in the happiest of colours..  All the way to the crematorium were groups of people waving..
 It is who you are.. not what you wear..
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crabbyob

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Re: Mourning etiquette
« Reply #9 on: Apr 16, 2021, 12:09:48 PM »
a friends 18 year old daughter who died of a blood disorder was cremated, but first the church service, black ties were banned, you were stopped at the door and a bright tie was given if you turned up with a black one... then at the crem a group of young people played amazing happy songs, singing with tears running down their faces, the most emotional funeral i have ever attended, she was a Liverpool supporter [i think she went to school with Kevin Keegan] but this was before he played for them... as the curtain closed the group played yes your right Alex "youll never walk alone" trust me its hard to sing while you are sobbing, but they managed it, as did I.[/i]
“If women ran the world we wouldn’t have wars, just intense negotiations every 28 days.”

Jacqueline

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Re: Mourning etiquette
« Reply #10 on: Apr 16, 2021, 03:13:28 PM »
For my nephews Humanist  funeral we were asked to wear our brightest clothes and glitter, everyone did and it was really lovely complete with his favorite David Bowie music.  I have no problems with finding black clothes though, about a third of my wardrobe comprises of black, used to be more but I have brightened up a bit.

Alex22

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Re: Mourning etiquette
« Reply #11 on: Apr 16, 2021, 04:29:09 PM »
a friends 18 year old daughter who died of a blood disorder was cremated, but first the church service, black ties were banned, you were stopped at the door and a bright tie was given if you turned up with a black one... then at the crem a group of young people played amazing happy songs, singing with tears running down their faces, the most emotional funeral i have ever attended, she was a Liverpool supporter [i think she went to school with Kevin Keegan] but this was before he played for them... as the curtain closed the group played yes your right Alex "youll never walk alone" trust me its hard to sing while you are sobbing, but they managed it, as did I.[/i]


I was at a funeral in January where this was also played, you're right it is such an emotional song.  I imagine even more so when the deceased is only 18 years old.

Michael Rolls

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Re: Mourning etiquette
« Reply #12 on: Apr 16, 2021, 05:33:36 PM »
that is so tragic - 18 - not even started to live
Mike
Thank you for the days, the days you gave me.
The older I get, the better I was!

sneakysnoopysniper

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Re: Mourning etiquette
« Reply #13 on: Apr 16, 2021, 07:51:09 PM »
Im glad to see all these alternative funerals with people in bright clothes and bonkas coffin designs. You can even get leopard print ones. Also people having DIY funerals.


The funeral industry needs to be turned on its head. I can see that happening more and more as people refuse to pay those disgusting prices. They are a waste of money.

One one of those "you cant pay we'll take it away" programs the woman had her life ruined by the cost of her father's funeral. If she had refused and walked away the local council would have paid.
« Last Edit: Apr 16, 2021, 07:56:49 PM by sneakysnoopysniper »
Rules are for the guidance of wise men and the blind obedience of fools

crabbyob

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Re: Mourning etiquette
« Reply #14 on: Apr 17, 2021, 10:05:55 AM »
yes a friend of mines mothers funeral the rob-doggers charged ...oooohh i cant remember the figure now but it was over five hundred quid to rent their limousine [family car] for two hours, around the same time i read about six guys going to Las vegas on a batchelor do who baulked at paying British Rail about seven hundred quid for return rail tickets to London, and insted hired a limo to pick them up drive them to LHR then pick them up on their return 700 with champagne thrown in




there is no pound key on this bloody keyboard...sigh
“If women ran the world we wouldn’t have wars, just intense negotiations every 28 days.”